Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Reverb 10: December 29th: Defining Moment

This post is part of Reverb 10.

December 29 – Defining Moment

Describe a defining moment or series of events that has affected your life this year.

(Author: Kathryn Fitzmaurice)

This Autumn, making the decision to stop working as a graphic designer and seek employment outside of the home was a defining moment. I mulled over the decision for weeks. I talked with all of the most important people in my life about it. I temporarily felt relieved when I imagined not being encumbered with the responsibility of working from home and the instability of income. I became joyful at the thought of going to work for 8 hours, doing a job and leaving. Allowing my free time to truly be my free time again.

Then the negative parts hit me. I wasn't clinically depressed, I didn't see a doctor or take medication. But I did have a little bit of situational depression. Those who know me well know how uncharacteristic I was acting. I laid on the couch and watched TV for 4 days. Sounds mild, but very out of the ordinary for me. I was so sad about closing the chapter of my life that involved graphic design. I let myself wallow, then forced myself to get off the couch, dust myself off, and move on. Literally within a week I had a job offer and realized that the only thing that stood between me and happiness was my own silly self.

It has been a great experience. I miss graphic design but still dabble in it some. The things this decision has brought into my life have been far greater than the things I miss...things being new experiences, feelings, and people...I missed the workforce more than I realized!

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